I guess this is something that bothers me because I believe I'm more than a nice rack and cute butt. There are times when guys I've talked to in the past or I've known in the past for whatever reason contact me, make small talk and then start talking about my physical attributes ie. "you have big boobs" or "looking good"....
********************NEWSFLASH GENTLEMEN!!!!!!********************
We don't need you to tell us you want to do the no pants dance with us... we know. Now the problem is this... most of the time you have known us before and never made a pass. I know this was usually the case with me. I wasn't always this awesome looking (yes, yes I'm tooting my own horn because I can dag nabbit!), believe it or not. I used to have crushes on guys that I thought were hot $hit and they wouldn't give me the time of day. Six years later I get emails and messages on social networks that start with...
"Hey Sherry! Long time no speak!" <<<<<<That is already the beginning of an uncomfortable conversation. From there it usually goes into the "how's life?" bit<<<< where I proceed to say that life is great and keeping me super busy and blah.. blah... blah... EVENTUALLY but not too far from when the conversation started it turns into, "where did those boobs come from you didn't look like that before?!"<<<< FIRST of all, unless there is a doctor out there handing out free boob jobs, I never got one! SECOND, had you paid attention when you had MY attention you would have seen them GROW! THIRD at this point I'm only entertaining a conversation with you, so you could EAT YOUR HEART OUT!
So here goes a personal story...
A few years ago I had a crush on this guy... We didn't hook up, just fooled around. Then we didn't talk for a very long time, like long enough for me to not think about him at all. Then a year or two later he contacts me on facebook and gives me his number, and tells me that I should text him because he wants to talk to me. He did the "how's life?" bit and then got down to business, tells me he doesn't want a serious relationship, and we should hang out. Then within a month he has a serious girlfriend. Don't get me wrong, it didn't affect my life because he wasn't a focal point but it just is so disappointing to see that some guys can be so full of themselves... although he remains nameless here, I won't trash talk him because as a person, he's a-ok.
Here's the kicker though! (This one here is the reason I am writing this post, I just noticed a pattern)
When I was significantly younger... I met a guy we can call him Chris (Not his name at all). Chris seemed to have it going on, he was older, he worked for "BMW", and he was pretty hott! Problem is he was on the verge of moving to FL because of a burn on his leg that was pretty bad. Regardless, we kept in contact for all those years. In the process I would send him little pics here and there of myself and he would send me pictures back, this was the extent of our fling. This was our thing, since we weren't able to see each other. We got to know each other pretty well and he even helped me out a few times. He was the beez knees... Then when I was finally able to make a trip down to FL, I find out he has a girlfriend who is pregnant. I know at this point that it's over and will not ever happen, so I agree to see him and hang out with him and my friends that were with me. Nothing at all happens... I'm talking not even a hug. This was in 2009 by the way. When I get back home I'm getting phone calls from the girlfriend calling me a slut and that I should know that he loves her and they are having a baby and they are soooooo happy and I need to stop trying to break up the happiness they have............. IS THIS B#*!@ SERIOUS?! I told her there was nothing going on and that we were just friends, but my best friend wasn't satisfied with that... So she then went on to tell the girlfriend that "he's a triflin a$s n*%$a" and that if he was able to lie to her or omit the fact that he was going to chill with me and we're just friends that she should just IMAGINE what he does with girls that aren't just friends....
Needless to say... that caused a lot of trouble.
Fast forward to this year... he contacts me again through facebook, and commences the "how's life?" bit and I give him the "life is great and keeping me super busy" and blah.. blah... blah..-bit and his next statement was "wow ,you still have big boobs!" I thought to myself that FOR SURE he had lost his Muhfuggin mind!
I really want to flip out but the truth is, that this kind of $hit is always going to happen, because we put ourselves out there and then want guys to respect us. I'm not proud of the shit that I did for any guy to ever think that it's ok to objectify me to the point where it just becomes about one of my body parts, or several. I've made a personal decision to not put myself in the "stupid" position. I will work on my actions and reactions and that way there will be no reason for me to be disrespected because I respected myself from the beginning. People don't always get what they want but they get what the deserve. When you push too hard for something you WANT, you end up getting the wrong thing, or you might even mess it up lol. I'm going to be a big girl now. I will not look for any one's attention. I will give myself attention and in the end... it will all work out.
I think I'm done venting.
<3,
Sherry
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